Cleaning the Closet (conclusion to He’s a Housekeeper, too?) From Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power

Welcome to Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power and thanks for coming back to this powerful series. I love that Jesus is our heart’s housekeeper, and that the tools that He uses to clean are gentle but strong, removing all residue and stain of the past. Grab your coffee and come on in. Let’s get back to cleaning the closet today! 🙂

Jesus is in the middle of explaining how often effects of things that have happened to us are like pieces of a puzzle, tightly knitted together as they form a complete picture that illuminates understanding into our closets of secrets.

I stared up at Him, feeling such a relief after blurting out one of the questions that had haunted me ever since I had escaped from the hands of the abuser. I felt a smile that warmed me from head to toe.

“See, one of residual effects of shame is the way that it cripples the abused from establishing personal boundaries, both physical and emotional.”

The tears of realization ran down my face as I agreed with Him and explained that for years, I had existed with the sense that my needs were unimportant compared to the needs of others.

“Beloved, that actually cycled into an unawareness of what your needs actually were, and so you existed without personal boundaries. But you are getting better at thriving instead of surviving.”

His reminder lightened my heart.

“See, you used to survive by avoiding pain and criticism at all costs as you tried the impossible: to impress everyone so you could feel acceptance. This leads to another piece, or effect, if you will.”

I looked down to where He was leaning and stared in awe at what I saw. I had not seen it until just then. It was a puzzle and He was placing another piece into it. I couldn’t quite make out the picture yet, but I could tell it was forming into something that looked like me. I brought my attention back to His voice.

“I see so many of my kids whose purpose has become looking for love. That pursuit interferes with a true connection and thus many who have been abused and wounded find their value in doing and not in being.”

He placed another piece in the puzzle and I gasped as it added to the picture of a heart that was bruised and dark in color. “But isn’t it good to please others?”

“Oh, yes, many of My scriptures talk about putting others ahead of yourself, but there is balance in this, and when one’s heart, or closet, is unpacked of old wounds, it becomes easier to see the balance in this.”

As I stared at the picture again, I saw something I hadn’t seen before: This pursuit had set me up for failure, because unconsciously I had expected others to be aware of my needs, and when they couldn’t fulfill them, I moved on to the next person, the next relationship, trying desperately to fill the hole within me.

He interrupted my silent thinking. “Daughter, you had no way of knowing that your continuing to form these relationships was setting you up for the cross-generational cycle, but you have chosen to break that cycle by allowing me into your heart and allowing me into the rooms of your heart. I am most delighted that we have begun the cleaning of this room which has held you in captivity for too long.”

I nodded my head in agreement.

“Now let me show you another piece.” He placed it in its spot and it added the color black to the already bleeding and bruised heart. “This is the effect of depression.” He sat up and grabbed a few more pieces. “Actually, these are what I call residual effects of child abuse.”

As He added the pieces, He named them. “Depression, death” –

My gasp interrupted Him.

“No, no, daughter, thoughts of suicide, which is a spirit of death.”

“Oh,” I nodded, still in a state of mixed emotion as the pieces pierced my heart with their reality in my own life.

He continued. “This one is sexual promiscuity,” and He placed the piece next to the last one. Fear went right beside it. “And then there’s anxiety.” He placed that one beside fear, surrounded by the others.

“That is one wounded heart there, Father, so dark and ugly.”

“That is why we must clean out the closet, Dear Daughter, so the effects will lose their power over your flesh and you will be better equipped to walk in My Spirit.”

Whew, I don’t know about you, but I think that’s enough cleaning for the day. Join me tomorrow for the conclusion and final cleaning of the closet!

Sparkling in His Sovereignty,

Evinda

 

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4 Responses to “Cleaning the Closet (conclusion to He’s a Housekeeper, too?) From Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power”

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  2. admin says:

    Thank you for stopping by “Coffee Hour”
    Hope you stop by again, Monday through Friday.
    Blessings,
    Evinda

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