Jenn’s Journey-from Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power

Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power...

Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power…

Thanks for coming to join me for Coffee Hour and my journey! Pour a cup of coffee, or tea, and join me as I share some of what God put on my heart this week about cleanliness and cleaning house.

Those of you who know me, know that I like to clean. I realize this makes me weird, but it is the truth. If I am stressed, upset, anxious, I go clean something. I am not sure what this says about me, but that is a topic for another time!

I have been going to a relationship class where we are reading a book called “How We Love” by Milan and Kay Yerkovich. (Highly recommend reading it, by the way) The premise of the book is that the way we love is imprinted in us in childhood and even if we have relatively good childhoods, these imprints are there. Let’s face it; we are all flawed in some way. Often these imprints lead to unhappy, troubled relationships. The book focuses on marriages; however, it can apply to any relationship.

Personally, this book has changed my life in that it explains what I have always tried to figure out about myself. I am really looking forward to the changes it will bring for me.

Naturally, this book encourages a lot of self-reflection and ‘owning’ of the way we react and act in our relationships. It is not always an easy process. I mean, who really wants to face the baggage?

The other morning as I was getting ready to go to church, a thought I have not had in a long time came into my mind. I was back in 7th grade, being called into my teacher’s office, where he proceeded to tell me how much he disliked the way I walked. Furthermore, he said that I walked as if I was “somebody” and I held my head too high.

I cannot presume what that man thought he was doing that day; however, I do know what it did…it made me feel ashamed. As if something was wrong with me. It made me realize that for some reason, I have had an inordinate amount of people in my life who have reinforced that belief in myself, and whether or not I have ‘allowed’ them to do that or not, it has been my experience.

Perhaps it is the fact I am getting older, or perhaps it is the sermon I heard the other day –coincidentally it was on “cleaning your garage”…the garage of our emotions, our spirit — that has made me think.. What is hiding inside that needs to get cleaned out?  And who exactly cleans it out?  Who makes the decision to clean out a literal garage?

You or I do. It’s the same with our emotions, old beliefs, old reactions, negativity. The list could go on. We must decide to confront those things that hold us back, or as the pastor said, “What is covered, never recovers. What is uncovered will give new life to discover.”

Maybe, just maybe I really AM somebody and I should hold my head high, because I am a daughter of the Most High God, and He has given me grace that covers all. He does not care what anyone else thinks or says of me because He knows what He thinks of me, what He thinks of all of us…and that is His unconditional love. He also gives us something new to discover, if we allow Him to lead us out of our old ways of thinking.

I do believe that the devil knows what to use to keep us discouraged, down and in the same old patterns. I thank God for the friends and family He is using to show me something different about myself; that He does not want me to stay in the same place I have always been. It is only through Him that we are truly changed…left to ourselves, we’ll let that garage get so piled up we can’t think straight!

I don’t know about you, but I am sure going to keep letting God in to do some house cleaning!

Until next week


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