When Bad Things Happen to Good People-From Coffee Hour@Chicklit Power-“If I could have coffee with God . . .”

Welcome to Coffee Hour and thanks for joining me! We’re still digging and searching for some answers to the tough question, “Why do bad things happen to good people,” a question that has turned into a series within the series.  Grab your coffee and go to that quiet place so we can seek Him for more answers for ourselves because you never know when we’re going to need to offer one of these answers for a good friend when a bad thing happens to him or her.

So we left off with my friend discovering that her husband was using drugs which sped up the demise of their marriage. She went on to build a wall around her heart and began isolating with her two boys, becoming incredibly independent, convinced that God, nor anyone else, would take care of them; she would have to. She worked three jobs to do this but this last wound inflicted by her now ex-husband added to her battle wounds, aka, the junk in her trunk, and caused her heart to harden just a bit more. A heart hardened only hardens more with injury and soon it turns to stone if not softened with His love. Her kids grew up and flew the coop and she was completely alone for several years, though she was in constant contact with her sons.

I’ll never forget meeting her. It was years ago when I used to ride the Metrolink to work. This season of my life was just after a couple years of unpacking some of my own junk, so I recognized some of hers. 🙂 We became friends, slowly. She was not one to jump into anything, let alone friendship. In fact, she was a bit prickly at first, but then the closer I got to her, the more I recognized her need for acceptance and love. I could see that she was a WWW (walking wounded woman) and I was so touched when she began to share with me about some of her pain. I began to pray for her and at times, even pray with her.

Looking back on it all now, I see how those were seeds planted in her journey but I don’t think she had ever come to terms with any of the stuff that had happened to her. I don’t think she had ever “had it out with our Father,” so to speak, and come to understand that He longs to use her past to positively influence her present and secure her future.

In the years that followed, I saw her through a few happy times, like when she started dating this man who really seemed to be prince charming, wined her and dined her and spoiled her but good, and just days after she said “I do,” he turned into a monster. I remember meeting with her after that nightmare and going over the pre-warning signs that she had received from God but had chosen to ignore, all for the sake of being loved and because she hadn’t allowed that need to be filled by the only One that can fill it, the need grew, unfulfilled, and the hole in her got a bit bigger.

Just when she seemed to be recovering from the deception and choices of her now second ex-husband, something happened that has left the hole in her gaping, and all that oozed out was bitterness and anger. Her son died in a freak accident over five years ago now and her consuming thoughts and wall of defense was that God could have stopped it. Oh, I have never endured the pain of losing a child, so I can’t say I understand, but I have loved my only child until I thought it would kill me, so I could only imagine! 🙁

She isolated from the world for years, and we didn’t lose contact, but we rarely spoke. I would always remember her birthday, and every now and then I would give her a call. I swear I could feel her negative energy over the phone and it was so hard to get around it, but finally, one day, I did, or I should say He did through me. Actually, I had posted something on Facebook about needing an assistant and she responded with a comment that sparked some communication and we began to connect again.

To make that long story short, through a series of conversations, and Him speaking through me and a couple of other people in her life, she is beginning to allow Him to use the pain of her past to positively affect her present and direct her future. The change in her is nothing short of a miracle and every time I talk with her, I am humbled to be in the journey with her, and for her to be part of mine to help each other when those bad things happen to us that threaten to derail us, distract us, or just plain destroy us. I rejoice in my heart knowing that He who began a good work in her will be faithful to complete it until the time of Christ Jesus, and the same goes for you and for me!

Praising Him for how He turns the bad that happens to good into something beautiful . . .

Evinda

 

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