The Bachelor

The Bachelor….

I have a confession to make: I used to LOVE watching this program, as well as The Bachelorette. It was like a temporary escape to fairy tale land, a place where dreams come true and fairy tales are realities without impossibilities. It was a nice thing to do to escape the pressures and concerns of my day, maybe even the occasional conflict with my own husband that I didn’t want to think about. It was my time to just sit and be entertained. I could just ooooh and ahhhh, and of course root for the one I thought the Bachelor should pick and/or nod my head in disgust at the more desperate seekers for love. But when the show’s over and I come back to reality, I am hit in the face with the truth like a glass of ice water causing a brain freeze and I am forced to think about the show’s message and/or its influence.

Now, let’s give the producers and Chris Harrison the benefit of the doubt and say that they have nothing but good intentions on their minds as they help people find love; after all, that is a common need in all of us. And they did show some character when they removed an employee of the show as well as one of the hopefuls for their inappropriate conduct. None of us REALLY know what went on behind closed doors; therefore, it would be unfair to comment further. But, unfortunately, there are many out there who have been quite demeaning and cutting when writing articles and expressing opinions about this show. I do not wish to join them by criticizing; I’ll simply stick to the facts upon which I offer this humble but passionate opinion — and if I can kindly request that any comments be given in the same vain.

Whether you are liberal, conservative, believe in God or don’t, there are a few problems with the show and its philosophy, hence this is the first of The Bachelor blog series. The loudest truth ringing in my ears is this: romance should be saved for marriage; outside of marriage, it is just a stage setting you up for failure. Come on, let’s be honest. If someone picked you up in a limo, took you to an incredibly handsome, hardworking and seemingly nice guy, aka, Mr. Perfect, who just happened to be waiting with open arms to greet you and carry you up and away in a helicopter, or on a horse, or a motorcycle to an incredible destination with ambiance so breathtaking you can’t help but be captivated, where you share an amazing never-again-to-afford kind of meal, toast to each other with free-flowing wine and/or champagne, I ask you, who wouldn’t have butterflies and mistake it for love? Who wouldn’t want to “fall in love”? Why is it that the “fall” never seems to be too deep or last too long?

Hmmm, something to think about. Keep checking in for more blogs on The Bachelor, and find out more about the upcoming Blog Talk Radio show entitled “Kiss Dating Good-bye”!!!

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12 Responses to “The Bachelor”

  1. Jennifer says:

    i like to watch that show too and i know it is all in good reality. i have always dreamt that my handsome prince charming would come to me like the show but then i realized that all i need is a man that loves mefor who i am and vise versa. my husband is my prince charming that didnt ride in on a horse but he did sweep me off my feet just by being himself. I think that the show needs to be more about the REAL life instead of the “fake” put them in actual situations and see if they fall in love with the real man or if they just want the money and the lavish life. everyone thinks that money is everything that you will be happy but the forget that “money doesnt buy happiness” it just buys trouble. God has a plan for everyone and he has someone special for everyone, so let him take control. I let him take over and he found me a wonderful man that treats me very well.

  2. admin says:

    Jennifer,
    so blessed that you understood the message. Thank you for taking the time to share:)

  3. Gail says:

    Hmmmm. Thinking about it. Have watched every season except the first. It takes me to a fairy tale land that is soooo far from my own reality, and I have to admit that I do enjoy going there once a week for a couple hours to be entertained. I look forward to your take on the fallacies of dating vs. romance and marriage.

  4. Lauren says:

    Very well written… I’ve watched many of the seasons and I’ll say that I totally agree! It is definitely entertaining because everyone can relate to the quest for love. The problem in my opinion is that until after the show, they don’t get to show the kind of respect to each other that needs to be seen before a marriage commitment is considered. I’ll leave it at that for now. I’m excited for more Bachelor blog posts…

  5. Sherrie says:

    Interesting road to take with the blog 🙂 I haven’t watched the shows but have read “romance novels” in the past with the same escape while on the fairy tale road. I think, as an emotional female I had a tendency to mix lust up with love. This is a painful path as it lead me to the pit of relationship failure. I am blessed to have found my soulmate in my husband of 22 years. Just having the awareness of what is real and what is our dream is going to be very helpful.
    Will be great to take this trip with you, Look forward to the talk show. Thanks

  6. Kym says:

    I noticed your radio blog comment “Kiss Dating Goodbye” and wondered if that’s you that will be hosting the radio show or the author of “Kissing Dating Goodbye” Josh Harris? He is a young homeschooled man who wrote that book about 7 years ago when he chose to change from dating to courtship. He is now married, but it is a great book to have young teens read because it questions the reasons for dating. Really why should teens be dating at 16? What makes 16 the golden age to date? Are they ready for marraige? Isn’t that why we date to find our marraige partner? I challenged mine to wait…. some have and some didn’t….But waiting on the one God has for you is so much better. The ones who chose not to wait are seeing that now and it is a hard road to walk. I could say so much more, but let me say I heard a youth pastor describe this situation using playdough as the visual aid to his sermon. He told the youth you meet your first love and he entwines the playdough, things are going well, but problems come up and you break up, he takes as much of the colors of playdough apart as he can, but can you really get both the colors completely apart. You meet love of you life #2 he mixes in another color and you break up tears the other color as much as he can…He goes on a few more times and then says this is your heart and its a mess many parts of all those relationships are still in you and the next relationship or marraige gets all those parts too. Not a pretty sight. Better to seek God and wait for the one He has for you.

  7. admin says:

    Kym,
    yep, that’s me…. So keep checking in at the website for more details. It should be starting in a couple of weeks.
    Hugs
    Evinda

  8. admin says:

    Kym,
    Loved your full comment, and no, it’s not Josh Harris, though that is how the seed was planted, through his book. Maybe I could invite you to be a part of one of the shows and share this very analogy. Would love to have you. Would u b interested?
    Hugs

  9. admin says:

    Thank you, and it’s going to be a fun ride, so stay with us.
    Hugs

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