Nana Holds From Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power

Coffee Hour!

Thanks so much for coming by today and joining me for a little break! I know it’s not always easy to turn off all the distractions and settle in for a little break, but I’m glad you could make it today! 🙂 Grab your coffee and come on in. I was in the midst of a mind-boggling revelation, that looking after a toddler takes a lot of energy! 🙂

The physical energy is only part of it. There is definitely an emotional energy required in looking after this little guy as well as a level of spiritual energy. See, looking back on my own child-raising experience with my only son, I can see clearly now where I failed and/or fell short in many areas and one of those areas was in consistency. It takes consistency to follow through with what you say you’re going to do and that can be exhausting, because let’s face it, little toddlers don’t catch on right away for whatever reason. The trick is learning to appreciate their little personalities without squashing them while setting boundaries for them to live by.

One example was with the way he interacted with the four-legged kids in the house. For some reason, his aggressions came out when it came to petting either of them. Admittedly, I had to teach my other grandkids how to be gentle with the dogs, but Bryden was much more aggressive and definitely more stubborn when it came to getting the message, “BE GENTLE!”

The first few times, we were patient and gentle in our explaining how to pet the dogs. Can you just hear us, “Nice doggies; Nice doggies.” But after more than a few times of coming around the corner to witness Bryden literally whacking either little Baraka or Sparky as if he were slugging a ball, and bouncing on Amos as if he were his own personal horse, my patience and gentleness flew out the window and firm and stern stepped in. Hand, meet butt, butt, meet hand – now after receiving some solid advice from several people about that, I use a little paddle so he doesn’t confuse my hand as being bipolar, showing love one minute and spankings the next!Day three in his new home with his new toy, Amos!

What we did do is sit him in time out for at least three minutes – wow, really tough, huh? If he was still crying, then I would tell him “When you’re done, I’ll let you come out of time-out,” so it was his choice. When he stopped crying, I’d hunker down to look at his adorable face stained with tears and I would say: “You don’t hit the dogs; that’s not nice.” To which he’d respond: “K-k-k — Kay.” And then I’d say, “Do you want to say you’re sorry to Sparky,” or whichever one he had walloped? And he would say, “Yeah,” and breathe in a big gulp of air to make up for what he’d lost while crying.

That was like a ten to fifteen minute ordeal, and I’d like to say it only took one visit to time-out, but actually, since we have three dogs, it took at least three times! The follow-through was so important, and while surfing the rough waters trying to find our role in Bryden’s life, we both were/are determined to stand firm on our board of faith, rising to meet the waves with consistency, determined to come out standing.

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Smiling,

Evinda

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One Response to “Nana Holds From Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power”

  1. Jan Bachelor says:

    I believe the swats were appropriate to get his attention that this was not a suggestion, but a rule. Kids don’t seem to have an understanding of words without ramifications attached to them, be they be good or bad. Training up a child is process of repeating over and over, then reminding over and over and somewhere in all this they might actually retain it. Child rearing is for the strong, brave, patient, and a really good plan. Also an escape route for yourself would be nice, like a underground bunker with 6ft steel doors and lots of chocolate and wine stored. Ha