Posts Tagged ‘Bible Gateway’

Faith Filled Friday

Friday, November 25th, 2016

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Hello and welcome back to Faith Filled Friday! 

This last year I have felt an incredible sadness. I supposed I have always had issues with sadness and depression, which is why I came back to Trench Class again. I wanted to do it for myself and no one else. Some answers are found along the way but much like the exploration of our deep oceans or vastness of space, more questions are found than answers discovered. Putting it together is a daunting task and I certainly feel like blocking it out. Don’t we all? 

My heartbreak comes from relationships in which I have given all of me, something I’m learning is never healthy! It’s not enough to put one foot in front of the other physically, but to move forward each and every day emotionally as well.

How do we do that? 

Sometimes I will just sit down on my fire tablet and just look for beautiful pictures. Sometimes I stay out longer after work ends not only to catch the sun rise into a new day, but to listen to the birds wake from their slumber and start to sing. I often ask myself, what might I hear that I have not heard before? It’s nice to close my eyes and just tune my ears to the radio waves of God’s creation. I even picked up a weed that had seen much better days. I have seen a weed like this so many times but never picked it up and looked at it closely…until the other day, and what I saw really amazed me. It looked like there were small finish nails that had been lightly hammered into it. As I looked at it I noticed a bug I had not noticed when I had picked it up. Hmmm, a chance encounter perhaps? I got lost watching this bug take its steps through the maze of “finish nails.” Just observing a life other than mine took my focus to a different place.

I began to wonder what God’s purpose was for this lil’ bug. I can get lost in wondering what sensory items in its little body it might have. I wondered how hard it was for it to find a mate, to find a meal. I was so lost in the moment.

But the sadness and depression seem to be looming around the corner. No matter how much I pray or try and be positive it comes my way so frequently. It’s just like the pain I live with; it’s always there, a bit better at times, yet still there. But that bug has been in my head for several days now. I wonder if something is leading the bug, like some magnetic northern wave of energy or the wind at its back. Something drives it forward. And then it hit me: Sometimes that is the only step we need to take, to insure the next one after it. I am not sure where I am going in life, not sure if I will ever love again, but I have taken that step of forgiving which free me to step in between the nails myself. Step by step, nail by nail, perhaps I am following the Holy Spirit as it leads me to a better place. I really am not quite sure. I just have to keep doing my part. 

Pretty incredible to think how a bug helped out a human being, thousands of times its size. I just can’t help but wonder if God gets a kick out of the things I find and appreciate. I know it is all part of the healing, all part of appreciating and loving life. 

I’d love to hear sometime about the things all of you might come across, things so small that they are missed more than found. What joy or emotion you might find in appreciating God’s creations.

Well time for work. Have a good day everyone and as usual… MUCH LOVE!

John

Wednesday’s Word

Wednesday, November 23rd, 2016

Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power...

Welcome to Coffee Hour, friends, and to Wednesday’s Word. I can’t believe tomorrow is Thanksgiving! And I can’t believe how the time is just whizzing by! I wrote this poem three Thanksgivings ago now, when my son and his family had moved to Texas…oh, how I miss them, especially around the holidays. 

But God has spoke a poignant message to my heart and just like home is where the heart is, Thanksgiving is also a matter of the heart and isn’t just a day to celebrate, but an attitude to adopt!

I hope this poem brings a giggle to your soul and a new perspective on/in life and family!


Twas the Night Before Thanksgiving

Twas the night before Thanksgiving and all through the house

Every creature was stirring, including the mouse

Everyone was working on all of the fixings

The noise and smells were coming from the kitchen

The children were busy with their tablets and toys

Captured in their games, they made not a noise

While the adults laughed and worked all collectively

What a beautiful sight it was for any heart to see

When all of a sudden there arose such a clatter

Mom ran to the kitchen to see what was the matter

She looked to the left and she looked to the right

She couldn’t believe what was in plain sight

There was broken glass from a favorite platter

And at first glance, she knew it didn’t matter

Everyone was frozen, waiting for her reaction

But she didn’t give the devil that satisfaction

The counters were a mess, preparations everywhere

It looked as though a tornado had just gone thru there

The turkey had flown from the platter to the floor

The poor thing looked like it just couldn’t take no more

The stove was a disaster waiting to happen

full of pots and pans, handles overlapping

The old mom would have immediately gotten on her broom

And painted the atmosphere with a bit of doom and gloom

But the new and improved mom was no longer that way

For she had learned the true meaning of Thanksgiving Day

She stared at each of them and the mess they surrounded

Knowing her response would leave each one of them astounded

 

Now sons, now daughters, in-laws and friends like family

Is this ever a sight for the eyes of my heart to see?

More than the chaos, the mess on the floor

The memories we’re making are worth so much more

So grab a rag, and a dishtowel too

Here’s one for each and every one of you

Let’s work together in cleaning up this mess

It will only take a few minutes or less

Pick up the turkey, and we’ll wash him off

We’ll stuff him but good and put him in the trough 

We’ll baste him all over, and get him ready to eat

No one will ever know we stepped on his feet

And when the morrow comes and we gather for the meal

We’ll be able to discern what matters and what’s real

Faith, family, friends, love and laughter

Help to bring us all the happily ever after

I looked to each of them with tears in my eyes

And said something I had just realized

Oh, why can’t it be Thanksgiving every day?

Loving each other in a Christ-like way

 

Patience, self-control, love and joy too

Are there for the asking for each of you

We don’t have to wait for a holiday to see

That Christ’s greatest gift is that of family

Praying you enjoy your Thanksgiving, no matter what circumstances you are in, no matter who you are with … or not with!

Thankfully,

Evinda

kim L

Monday’s Mantra

Monday, November 21st, 2016

Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power...

Welcome to Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power and Trench Classes United. I’m so glad you could join us for a few minutes and a Monday’s Mantra to encourage your soul! Come on in and join us for a conversation about time management and prioritizing our time and we are still on the parable of The Good Samaritan as taught in Luke 10.

“We each have 24 hours in a given day; how we choose to spend each moment determines how spent we are”! EL

Let’s face it; one of the top objections, aka excuses, for not neighboring, let alone being mindful of others is time…because we’re just too busy. So let’s sit here for just a bit. We need to have the eyes of our heart opened. But that can’t happen while we’re on the run! When you open up your eyes in the morning, what’s the first thing you do? Do you check social media or do you check in with God?   

I love what Jullien Gordon, a millennial (Generation Y) expert says about this topic of “busy.” she distinguishes between a workaholic and a high performer by saying the workaholic or the busy person wants to look more important while the high performer looks for important work! 

In other words, when we’re busy being busy, we miss opportunities to neighbor because we don’t even recognize them. We’ve got to take the time to make the time, just like the Samaritan did!

Ephesians 5:15-17 suggests to us to “be careful how you live,” in other words, be mindful of how we invest our time.  But how do we stop being so busy at being busy? Could it be that our priorities are a bit out of alignment because of the way we begin our day? As I rewind the clock of my spiritual journey, I can honestly say that I am most productive when I get plugged into my source of energy first thing in the morning, or the rest of the day seems to go awry. 

Psalm 90:14 says it perfectly: “Satisfy us in the morning with your steadfast love so that we may rejoice and be glad all our days.” Have you ever tried to eat a meal while on the run? I can’t help but giggle when I get that picture. We can’t sit and soak in His steadfast love if we don’t sit…and just be!

Oh, I can hear you now…but I have no time in the morning to meet with Him…oh, Coffee Hour Friend, you can’t afford not to because the crazy thing is, if/when you put Him first in  your day, He will multiply your productivity! Does a car run with no gas, or oil, or water? Does a light turn on without being plugged in to its source of power? Well, we are called to be lights…plug in first thing and see what happens!

Love,

Evinda

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Faith Filled Friday

Friday, November 18th, 2016

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Hello and welcome back to Faith Filled Friday my friends! 

I have given a lot of thought recently to the grief I tend to carry for so much of the things that have happened in my life. I always hear people say things like: “You just have to will yourself through this; you’re depressed; this is not healthy for you.” 

These quips lend themselves to helping me feel that people don’t understand that sometimes the pain of grief itself is not always something that one day is gone for people like me. I can’t just un-see, un-feel, de-skin it. The scars run too deep and I carry these scars day in, day out. I run the gamut as I learn to live with them. They will never go away. 

And yet, I have come to learn that I can surely navigate and transform our ways in which we handle this grief, depression and sadness. We all can. We can grow from them. It’s not that we are ever victorious over these things; it’s that we learn how to grow the seeds that survive the storm, the flooding, the winds of trials and troubles… to harvest, feed and share with others through their storms. 

I can’t tell you how many times I have seen people trade their pain for some kind of temporary relief. Call it the bottom of a bottle, the needle to a vein, the cutting, and even sexual escapades. Why can’t we live in harmony by feeling our way through this pain, to learn from it, be at utter peace with it? It is not for others to paint it on our canvas like it’s something to be ashamed of. It’s not that I can control it that makes me a better person… but that I can ultimately live with it and because I do, I can learn from it. 

I refuse to just ignore it. Doing so only means I will repeat my own patterns and live by the destructive traits started in early childhood. God’s love means that we can do more than survive, that we can learn to thrive and step up to help others. Getting accustomed to a different mindset is most difficult, but we can start by telling ourselves it is ok to feel pain, but to not be shackled by it. We must not only love ourselves simply, but diversify our way of healing. 

Horrific pain doesn’t have to be an anchor, but more a set of wings we can share with others in their time of grief by leaping from our own nest.

Much love everyone… God bless

John Tam

Wednesday’s Word

Wednesday, November 16th, 2016

Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power...

Two Wrongs Don’t Make a Right!


Thanks for joining us for Wednesday’s Word @ Coffee Hour with Chicklit Power and Trench Classes United. Grab your favorite beverage and your strand of faith and let’s go tie some knots together.

Just a little over a week ago all of us witnessed a moment in history…a shifting, if you will, an unexpected jolt for many as the results for president were announced.  No, don’t worry; I’m not going to make this political. Instead, I’m going to bring it back to each of us as individuals, one nation under God, and the conduct expected of us by the Overseer of our soul. 

Come with me to 1st Peter 3:8-10 where Peter is instructing the new believers who are enduring a lot of persecution for their beliefs. I truly believe with all my heart that these words are truth to our troubled souls in this most uncertain time in our lives and nation: “8Finally, ALL OF YOU, (emphasis added) have unity of spirit, sympathy, love for one another, a tender heart, and a humble mind.9Do not repay evil for evil or abuse for abuse; but on the contrary, repay with a blessing. It is for this that you were called—that you might inherit a blessing.

Do I need to say more?

Not really, but of course I will; after all, it’s Coffee Hour!

I have heard many stories of others being verbally abused by those who felt the election didn’t go the way they wanted, but I’ve also watched as anger and fury have literally contorted souls, creating an entirely different personality than what we had come to know and love. It has been heart-wrenching to watch, but I’ve also experienced the backlash from those who just have a very strong opinion. And when I step back and watch, without putting my own two cents in there, I realize there is a fear driving each and every one of them to this angry boiling point, and instead of making it about our fear, our opinions, which are pride-driven as well, maybe we ought to remember Who is ultimately in charge. This didn’t knock Him off His throne, beloved!

This week’s word comes as a great reminder to all of us from the Authority over heaven and earth, the One whom you and I will ultimately answer to for our conduct, the One watching, and I’m certain, shaking His head, His heart grieving over the division of what was once one nation under God, and yet…my heart eagerly awaits for Him to move mightily for I believe what was meant for evil will be used for good and His glory; I believe this nation is finally ready for another revival! 

We as “believers” need to turn our focus upward, winning others over by our gentle spirit, our sympathy and love for one another, moved into action by a tender heart and a humble mind…ah, yes, humility. Oh, Coffee Hour friend, where is our humility? When it’s all said and done, He’s not going to ask who we voted for, but one thing I do know is He will talk to us about our conduct after this most pivotal election!

Humbly,

Evinda 

kim L

Monday’s Mantra

Monday, November 14th, 2016

Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power...

Up and Out!


Thanks so much for joining us for Coffeehour @ chicklitpower and Trench Classes United! Welcome to Monday’s Mantra. Grab your coffee, or your favorite break time beverage and your Strand of Faith and let’s go tie some knots as we wrap up “How to neighbor” with the final words of verse 35: and whatever more you spend, when I come again, I will repay you.” For those who are new to this series, we are talking about the parable of The Good Samaritan and all the principles we can learn to live by from these few verses in Luke 10.

When the Samaritan left, it wasn’t like he had a cell phone and could call the innkeeper and have any balance sent to him by snail mail! Oh, how I would have loved to have been a fly on the wall to listen and watch this conversation take place. Not much detail is given about their conversation but it is safe to presume that the innkeeper agreed because the Samaritan leaves with the promise of returning. 

That brings us to the final characteristic of how to neighbor who we neighbor, which is almost exactly the same as what starts the process: Keeping our eyes open. It’s a form of focus, if you will. It rings in this truth: when we are about His business, He’s taking care of our business, as promised in Matthew 6:33.

Proverbs 16:3 tells us to commit our work to the Lord, and our thoughts will be established. Wow, so few words that pack such a powerful punch. In other words, we don’t have to chase our tails and go around and around the same mountain, but if we turn our focus upwards, He will lead us onward! The moment we take our focus off of our Guide, we begin to walk sort of caddy-wampus, at least I do.  

The other day, as I was riding one of the longest escalators in L.A., I looked up to the tall, and taller and tallest buildings, breathed a big sigh of contentment and asked, “What do you have for me today, Lord?” And within two hours He showed me. I had not one, but two divine appointments. 

Take a moment and ask yourself: What are two things that get in my way of keeping my eyes open to the needs of others around you? Go ahead, be honest; no one’s going to judge you! 

So how do we do avoid the distractions, or set aside those things which concern us to be more available to neighbor? I think it begins with understanding that we don’t have to do it alone. We have been promised a Helper. In John 14:26, Jesus tells the disciples – and you and I are part of that crowd, that He will send the helper, the Holy Spirit to teach us all things. What a comfort! 

All we have to do is resolve in our hearts to acknowledge and accept that help; in other words, live like He’s alive in us. The word root for resolve is “reso” and the Greek translation defines it like this: “to partner with the Holy Spirit”! I don’t know about you but I find that affirming and confirming and comforting. 

Oh, what would our worlds look like if we lived like HE is alive in us?

Love,

Evinda

kim L

Faith Filled Friday

Friday, November 11th, 2016

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Hello and welcome back to our Faith-Filled Friday. Hope everyone was able to put a great week behind them.

This week I was lucky enough to volunteer to help a young boy do his homework. He calls me Uncle John. I watched him struggle to keep his mind on the task of his homework. Every little thing around him would distract him. Like most children, he’d rather laugh and have fun than dedicate his time to homework. I could see so much of myself in Jacob Anything could distract me, too. In fact, to this day, I can struggle concentrating on the task at hand before my mind jumps elsewhere. Anyway, I kept hearing his parents get on him and as the time ticked by, I noticed we all were getting more and more tired, so I decided to try something different, to jump in there and start tackling it with him. There I was reaching out to help this young man. He had a lot more homework than I assumed he did, and the harder it got the more he resisted…at first. But we jumped on it and page by page the finish line came closer and closer until we were there. 

I could not help but feel a sense of accomplishing it with him. For a moment I relished the thought that it would be so neat to be a father, helping my child enrich his mind and to try and center one’s self to accomplish the goal. 

I told Jacob about how good it feels to accomplish things and that getting in a great habit of taking the initiative to complete his homework will bring a sense of accomplishment in other areas of his life. So I challenged him to try next time and told him if he needs help, we can do it over the phone or I would be willing to come by.

The thing I find funny is that when I told him this, I had a flashback to my childhood. It was like I could see more clearly the mistakes I had made as a young boy, a teenager, and even as a man. It is so true that sometimes we must connect with our deep past to just get a better inkling of who we are. It really made stop and think about how the traits we get from childhood can stick with us and forge a road before us without us even realizing that those things are already out there for us, waiting for us to make the same mistakes over and over again. 

Guiding little Jacob for just that night really opened my own eyes to a couple of things that perhaps I have been overlooking. Could God inspire us in such a way? Could He be helping us to not only enrich the mind of a child but to also fulfill a sense of the fatherhood I have felt I would never have? Could He be guiding me toward looking at things in different ways to and help me concentrate more? 

The thing I love about God is that the possibilities are endless and most magical in their own ways. I came home completely exhausted, and yes, a 3rd grader’s homework he was behind on wore out this 40-something- year-old guy. But I still managed to get home and take the time to write this blog and now from here go to work. It will be a hard night ahead for sure, but I am anxious to get to it. Although Jacob won’t see me write this blog or even getting through work tonight, I can’t help but have a sense of wanting to lead by example. Talk about a multi-tasking God! 

This week, I challenge you and myself to let youthful individuals bring a sense of who we are and where we came from all while packing a lesson, not only for them, but also for us. 

Much love and God bless everyone.

John Tam

Wednesday’s Word

Wednesday, November 9th, 2016

Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power...

How Hungry Are You?

1st Peter 2:1-3: Therefore, laying aside all malice, all deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and all evil speaking, 2as newborn babies, desire the pure milk of the word, that you may grow thereby, 3if indeed you have tasted that the Lord is gracious.


Welcome to coffee hour @ Chicklit Power and Trench Classes United. I’m so glad you could join us for Wednesday’s Word. Grab your favorite beverage, your Strand of Faith and let’s go tie some knot that our faith would not come unraveled in those tough and challenging times.

Have you ever met someone who just hasn’t grown up? It’s as if they got stuck somewhere along the way, like maybe out of high school – actually more common than we realize –they seem to want to hang out with younger people, continue practicing things that are not only immature for their age, but inappropriate for their soul’s growth, seeking acceptance and approval with every move. I remember how my son struggled with the concept of growing up as he was making his way closer to the end of high school. I had no idea then that he was so full of fear at the thought of growing up, but it drove him to more fear-based decisions and choices. Let’s face it, growing up can be overwhelming to our kids, especially if they have Super-parents who are doing everything everywhere but not necessarily at home, or if they have had absent parents, meaning no parents at all!

But for the most part, when we rewind our own childhood movies, and those of many others, we can see this one theme: children just want to hurry up and grow up!

As I pondered these verses, I wondered to myself, why does Peter use the analogy of newborn babies and the desire for pure milk right after an instruction to put away some childish characteristics? And then it hit me – I can be a bit slow! The only way to put away those childish behaviors away and not partake of them is to feast on/in His Word.  

Think about it: when a baby is hungry, there’s no denying it, right? Could it be He wants us to hunger for His Word like we do food? So many things are planned around food, and food is to the body what His Word is to our souls! When you are getting ready to sit down to eat a favorite meal, think about how you feel: your mouth waters, your tummy makes sounds that sound like percussion beats in a band, the anticipation is finally over; and then there’s the happiness over a meal well prepared, and finally the satisfaction you feel after eating.

See the more we take in of His principles and promises, the easier it will be to leave these childish characteristics aside, and I believe that these five listed in verse 1 pretty much cover every sin or shortcoming ever committed by man…and woman! Maybe better said, these are the ingredients to anything that we do that leads us away from the “pure milk.”

Let’s look at each of them quickly: Malice is: “Desire to cause pain, injury, or distress to another,” and/or 2”Intent to commit an unlawful act or cause harm without legal justification or excuse.

Wow, His word tells us to leave vengeance to Him!

Deceit: “Dishonest behavior: behavior that is meant to fool or trick someone,” and this includes speech!

Again we are warned in His Word over and over to speak things that lift up not tear down.

Hypocrisy: “The behavior of people who do things that they tell other people not to do: behavior that does not agree with what someone claims to believe or feel.”

We are all guilty of this one and we’ve all experienced it!

Envy:  “The feeling of wanting to have what someone else has.

Oh, my goodness, again, His word is replete with examples of being content in all circumstances!

And then evil speaking, well that’s just talking wrong/bad about someone or something, or even having a potty mouth in high gear!

So, as I look at these verses, I get the sense that if we would crave His word as much as we crave our favorite food, these childish characteristics would no longer have power over us and in us! 

Abba, help me to crave Your Word as much as I crave a great steak, or my favorite dessert, Skinny Cow lathered up in peanut butter!

From my heart to yours,

Evinda

kim L

Monday’s Mantra

Monday, November 7th, 2016

Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power...

Heart Service, Not Lip Service!


Welcome to Coffee Hour @ Chicklitpower and Trench Classes United. I’m so glad you could join us today for a little break, a little something from my heart to yours! Let’s get back to Luke 10 and the parable of the Good Samaritan.

So we’ve been sitting in verses 33 and 34 for a few Mondays and have discovered five characteristics that model how to neighbor. Today, we will look at the sixth one. In verse 35, Jesus tells us that when the Samaritan departed the next day, “…he took out two denari, gave them to the innkeeper and said to him, ‘Take care of him”…. 

It’s interesting that Jesus uses the story of the good but despised Samaritan to make clear to us how we should neighbor who we neighbor. The more I read into this parable, the more I see that Jesus looks at the heart; it’s all about the attitude of the heart. Did you know that a denari was the equivalent of a day’s wage for the Samaritan? The Samaritan left the innkeeper with two days’ wages and didn’t even flinch! Jesus asks that whatever we do or give, to do and give freely. In other words, we need to check our attitudes which flow from the heart. Let’s look at the attitudes of the other people involved in this parable:

The lawyer actually treated the wounded man as a subject to discuss and debate, perhaps with the thought of even tricking Jesus. Now, let’s bring this closer to us: How many of us sit around talking about the needs of others without doing something about it? This is lip service, not heart service! Isaiah 29:13 talks about this: “Therefore the Lord said, ‘Inasmuch as these people draw near with their mouths and honor Me with their lips, but have removed their hearts far from Me, and their fear toward me is taught by the commandment of men’”… The Lord has the video camera into every crevice of our heart!

The thieves harmed and wounded the man, treated him as someone to use and exploit. We should never use someone’s loss for our gain in any way; in other words, when someone is down, do we take advantage? Or when/if we help someone who is down, what is our motive? Another motive that can be kind of sticky is pity: When we help our less-fortunate neighbor, we need to do so with a sense of respect. Respect Jesus style isn’t earned: It’s letting someone be who they are right where they are! We need to remember to do a heart check! Philippians 2:3 reminds us of this very thing: “Let nothing be done of selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself.” 

The priest and the Levite, aka, the religious ones, treated him as if he weren’t even there, a potential problem that they didn’t want to involve themselves with or in. Oh, how true it is that the church is really a hospital and all of us its patients! Shouldn’t we be asking Jesus to help us see what He sees, how He sees when He sees? When we come upon our neighbor, if we don’t make the time to take the time to learn, to listen and to remember, have we really neighbored? 

And then there is the innkeeper who gets to serve for a fee. Does it always have to be about payment?  To do something without the expectation of payment is a dual blessing, and often it’s difficult to distinguish who gets blessed more, the giver or the receiver. Acts 20:35 reminds us of Jesus’ words; that it is more blessed than to receive.

Oh, how blessed I am to know that though I have demonstrated each and every one of these attitudes, I, just like these in the parable am not condemned but a work in progress as I strive to be a better neighbor, a better representative of Christ!

Happy neighboring, friend.

Evinda

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Faith Filled Friday’s

Friday, November 4th, 2016

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Hello and welcome back, Troopers, to another Faith Filled Friday! 


This last week was found much like the one before, and the one before that, a constant echo. Do we not appreciate a cold glass of ice water a lot more on a hot summer’s day? Might I appreciate a conversation more perhaps because I feel so alone? Maybe because I didn’t have all the toys other kids had, I have more imagination. Because I have not had a relationship that’s stood the test of time, despite working so hard for it, I appreciate it more when it was present and accounted for. The things we long for in life are often the things that could keep us humble. Being humble is a gift all to itself, yet, too easily lost.

Humility is about reminding ourselves daily to be grateful for what we have, but also maybe what we don’t have. I recently thought about moments of my childhood where I wanted a popular toy and I was never able to get it; we were just too poor. I never had a lot of toys, but I was humbled by that, and I likely will be for my entire lifetime too. Where and what I was lacking as a kid, I made up for with a growing imagination. My mind could turn anything into spaceship. I wasn’t only the regular super hero… I invented new ones. Any stick I picked up could be a firearm and would make me a trooper.

Although I have had moments of day dreaming and spacing out, I can’t recall too many times in my lifetime where I was bored. Yet I hear people say that all the time, even children. God instilled this gift in me and I am entirely content with feeling such precious life through the same wind that not only fills our lungs… but graces my face…. Can’t help but feel that sometimes I might just have more than others in that sense.

You see I find myself appreciating the fact that despite all the things I have wanted and not attained, that it has all formed this part and piece of me that loves, appreciates and feels things deeply. Sometimes that can feel like a curse. But for the most part being able to see God’s grace and love in things almost everywhere I look is such a huge gift. So I am thankful to the power of the universe, my mother and God himself, for not always providing and giving in to my wants. It’s amazing to me that how bad we can want and never have the joy of getting it, could bring happiness and joy on different levels. Sometimes our Father knows best!

Still it hurts to be so alone… often with the silence as a friend, but also an adversary. But this void perhaps isn’t an empty space as more it might be a cavern to feel from. I just know I love and appreciate music, laughter, joy, and yes even the tears that much more. I will never take for granted the time, the love, the joy and laughter of a friend or especially a mate that wants to stick around and believe in me.

Love is and always will be a best roommate. I know for me it is.

Much love and till next time, try and appreciate something you had to go without because of its end effect. God surely works in mysterious ways.

John